Regardless of age, children thrive in environments where they are nurtured and loved. They learn about the world around them when those closest to them join in their play, interests and exploration.

Grandparents often have the opportunity to spend more relaxed time with children. And they can enjoy children for who they are at the moment.

Unconditional Love
According to Dr. Arthur Kornhaber, M.D., president of the Foundation for Grandparenting and author of several books on the subject including The Grandparent Guide (McGraw-Hill/Contemporary Books, 2002), this unconditional love is second only in emotional power to the parent/child bond. It is the glue between grandparents and grandchildren. He adds this “vital connection” between you and your grandchild blossoms fully when the child has your undivided attention in an unhurried atmosphere.

In fact, he remarks the grandparent/grandchild relationship is an “illuminating” relationship comprised of the purest forms of human love: unconditional, nonjudgmental and freely given simply because a person exists.

“There is always some conditional element to a parent’s love," says Peggy Dolan, a grandmother of seven. "Grandparents are just glad to have you near." Dolan's favorite part of grandparenting is being with them, watching them grow and growing with them. She tries to take part in their activities often and champions their accomplishments.

Bridging Generations
Dr. Kornhaber cautions parents are the linchpin of the relationship between you and your grandchild so take care to nurture that relationship as well.

Susan V. Bosak, an author who specializes in helping grandparents build bonds with grandchildren, agrees. She says parents are the bridge between the two generations and set the tone for grandparent/grandchild relations.

According to researchers, the better the relationship between parents and grandparent, the greater the contact and closeness between grandparent and grandchild. However, it’s up to parents to send the message that grandparents are integral to their children’s lives.

A good relationship between grandparents and grandchildren doesn’t just happen, says Dawn Mark, a grandmother of six. It takes effort from the parents and grandparents, especially when it’s a long distance relationship.

Dolan agrees. She uses lots of telephone contact to bridge the gap. Dr. Kornhaber supports creative methods of communicating, adding that the greatest challenge to effective grandparenting is time and distance. It doesn’t matter if you live near or far, families who actively promote the connection between grandparents and grandchildren reap great rewards.

Treasured Bonds
The undemanding and loving bond grandparents offer is treasured by grandchildren and has a myriad of benefits to grandchildren. Free of the pressure of raising children, grandparents have the freedom to play without the parental worries.

Dolan sees this as a fresh start, a chance to avoid the mistakes she inadvertently made with her children. Dr. Kornhaber has discovered through his research that contact with a beloved elder enhances a child’s emotional, physical and spiritual health. Grandkids learn things from grandparents that they can learn nowhere else.

According to Bosak’s research for the Something to Remember Me By project, when children share in a grandparent’s interests and skills, they are introduced to new activities and ideas. Grandparents are very patient, effective teachers. In fact, knowledge, skills and attitudes picked up from grandparents tend to stick with children throughout their lifetimes more than those picked up from other sources. Dolan has taught her grandchildren how to sew and shares in this activity regularly.

Dr. Kornhaber found that children with strong relationships with their grandparents have a good sense of family and security, do better in school and feel comfortable with older people. Bosak, also a leading authority in intergenerational research, has found the relationship not only helps children get better grades, but also abstain from drugs and violence. Her book, How to Build the Grandma Connection (Communication Project, 2000), offers many practical tips for getting involved in a grandchild’s life.

A child cannot have too much love and attention. Love and affection is the No. 1 ingredient children need to develop optimally. According to Bosak, children feel special when they are spoiled by grandparents.

Social Gains
Grandmothers can serve as attachment figures and play pivotal roles in a young child’s social development. According to the organization Zero to Three, a link has been shown between higher social development scores and infants whose grandparents had greater amounts of family contact. It’s vital to allow the intergenerational bond to bloom early. Letting kids and grandparents work out their own special relationship sets up a strong connection for the future.

Grandparents instill unconditional love. That love, coupled with grandparents’ trademark patience, can help children to trust others, become more independent and take initiative. This dynamic does wonders for a child’s self-esteem. Children are forming beliefs about themselves early in life, and when grandparents are available to provide comfort, kids feel safe, secure and lovable. The undivided, no-strings attention helps bolster competence, too.

Grandparents have a vital role to play in kid’s lives. The intergenerational connection reflects a high value for family and tradition. A source of wisdom and stability, they provide families with a sense of who they are. Family life can be greatly enriched by sharing a cultural background, and grandparents can provide the necessary link between cultural heritage and present day customs.

Continued Traditions
Joe Mark, a grandfather of six, has kept the Slavic tradition of kielbasa and babka for Christmas morning breakfast. The grandkids look forward to this simple ritual. He and his wife try to pass down the customs their grandparents practiced, including cherished family recipes.

Whatever your family traditions, they are a link to the past and are valued as kids feel the roots of their ancestry. Depending on your grandchild’s age, you might give them some family history along with those traditions. Share the “good old days.” It’s bound to captivate youngsters, and the time will be well spent.

Whether grandparents live near or far, they have a vital role in child development and can sweeten a child’s life. It’s crucial to actively promote this intergenerational bond and consider the positive impact it holds for a child’s future.